Will you let go of what feel the most precious to you to open the space of your healing?
Over the last 10 years of doing healing work, one theme keeps coming back as I witness healing happening or not with my patients and in my community of friends and relatives. Every time someone healed, or I should say let the healing happen to them, something major had to be let seen, understood and let go. Never was the healing just received if nothing was changed in the way their life was. And always when the healing was blocked, it was because something misaligned with their soul trajectory was held too tightly.
When we are sick, in suffering or pain, when a physical, emotional, mental or spiritual illness surface, it is only to signal us what is not in alignment in our lives. It could be an addiction to a substance or a behavior, an attachment to an unhealthy situation (work, partnership, friend), or more “simply” a step that needs to be taken in order for the Self to be revealed, the soul to be healed.
We do not come in this body, to just eat, reproduce, go to work, and one day retire and die. We come into this body for a learning (healing) our soul has to experience. We come to remember our purpose and align every single action we take with it. Very often that soul growth is stopped by our belief system, our education, our social construct, our family traumas or our broken societal system. We are coming in this life to heal ourselves so we can heal the world.
I keep witnessing friends, patients, or stories of people who are sick, lost, in pain, unhappy, unfulfilled and are looking for something “out there” they can get to feel better. Another job, another home, another relationship, another lifestyle, or even another healing technic!
We want to be “saved” because we don’t believe or see how we can save ourselves… After years on the path I am definitely convinced there is nothing and no one to be saved but that is for another discussion I will save for later.
So, we go through life looking for that healing… Somewhere else, or in/through someone else… How disappointing, hopelessly funny, and yet empowering when we discover our healers and teachers can’t heal us! Yet when we can see the root of our illness(es) and imbalance(s), it is always something very core to who we are that need to change. And that always means that to heal we are going to have to let go of something major like our company, our job, our partner, our friends, some of the very core foundations of what gives us a certain sense of safety and wholeness. The healing process becomes not only a shedding of old skins but a total transformation of who we are (or think we are), a jump into the unknown, a falling upward as Richard Rohr so well describe.
The intense pain and the frightening horror of discovering the real root of the issue are way more devastating than the illness we are fighting hence why most people start to do some healing work and stop very quickly overwhelmed by the discovery! That’s why individuals get stuck but also communities, corporations and organizations, governments and countries. Let me repeat why:
The courage and strength it takes to heal is way more daunting than the potential consequence of not healing. Only those who walked the path in depth can truly talk about that and you can look for example at the life of the Buddhas or Saints for that. St Francis and his wealthy lifestyle, big parties with his friends and the safety of the fortune of his father, was an “easier” life choice than the path he had to take to step into his life purpose!
It is in the depth of that process that the healer can provide a safe and loving space for the healing to happen. When I say the “healer” I mean not only someone external with the skills to create that space around us, but also (and mainly!) our own inner healer with his/her self-love and compassionate heart.
We want to heal. Deeply inside we definitely want. Hence why we are suffering as we witness the distortion between where we are and where we know we want to be. And yet we resist. Life “as it is” is still acceptable! We grab onto the illusion of safety created by our actual lives. We prefer the pain of living a half-life, or not even living at all our lives, instead of taking to risk to be awake and alive for one day…
We somehow want to keep the job we are not happy with. The relationship that is unhealthy lying to ourselves about why we are not ready to go yet! The financial security we were told we have to focus all our efforts on, which keep us safe within the perimeter of our fears. We keep the behaviors that make us who we are, even if they are holding us down because we have no idea how to change them. We stay in the so-called comfort of our lives, in the middle of our pain. We would do everything to hold as much as we can in order to change the bare minimum and just be healed. But life, your soul, Spirit, God, who have a much better plan for you, will keep calling you, pushing you towards something else. And when the “pushing” encounter too much resistance, that is when we become sick and things will fall apart more deeply…
We know we need to live with a much deeper connection with Nature, but we want to keep the apartment in the crowded, noisy and polluted city we live in. We know we want to experience a much more emotional intimacy with a partner, but we stay in a barely satisfying relationship where our growth has stopped. We know we have a deep calling to serve the world in a different way, but we keep the job we are doing because we are afraid to lose everything.
We take all those decisions from a place of fear, instead of a place of love. From a place of scarcity instead of a place of abundance.
What an irony! When the whole world and planet is showing us constant abundance and love if we can take the time to see! We trust more our TVs and MBAs than the wisdom of forests who survived millions of years in pure joy, happiness, abundance, bliss and love! We trust more fear which always makes us worried, than love than always makes us happy!
We live with insanity and call it sanity!
How and why is this happening? On a physiological level, this is explained by a shutting down of our front nervous system, the one connected to our heart and guts, and an over activation of our ancient animalistic vagal system. This system operates only on 3 modes: Fight, fly away or frozen. If you take a minute to witness how you operate your life, or how the world around you operate, you will very quickly see which system run the show. We stay stuck and do not act. Or we fight. Or we just run away towards constant change (job, relationship, homes, etc.).
This is also the consequences of an overly patriarchal and masculine world where the mind run the show more than the Heart, where we trust more our logical brain than our intuition, where we are told that listening to feelings is to be weak and that we should be afraid of pretty much everything (losing our job, money, or anyone who do not behave or look like we do).
And finally, we truly lack Faith. We do not trust (or believe) that something much greater than us is at play around and within us, and that we can be saved and healed by Spirit or God. To the extreme case, we even laugh at those who believe or know!
So, the million-dollar question is what is preventing you to step into your healing? Which fears do you have in taking the steps which are needed to have you lived the life you always wanted?
- Do you have to let go of your company you built with so much sweat and tears?
- Let go of the job which creates a growing emotional cancer in your mind, body, and life?
- Reassess the friends and partners in your life as you can witness it is not the way you want to live?
- Leave the comfort of the home it took you so many years to build?
I do not have a specific answer for you. But I do know for sure that your healing depends fully on changing drastically the life you live. And the more serious the imbalance or the illness, the biggest the shift needs to be. I also do know that once you take that step you will start re-aligning yourself with the universal energy and light which power the universe and your body. An energy of creation, of abundance and of Love. Will that energy serve you better than your actual fears and resistance? I think you know the answer…
It’s time to let go. It’s time to be brave. It’s time to heal. Not only because the world needs the best version of you, but because there is an urgency. Our planet, our communities, our families, will not heal if we do not do this work for ourselves first!
How ironical that we want peace in the world but are unable to create inner peace in our minds or with our own parents! How ironical that we want to change the world but find it so hard to change our own lives! How ironical that we are seeking love so desperately around us (and expect it from others) when we can’t give this unconditional love to ourselves!
I am amazed and saddened by the amount of pain, anger, and criticism I read on social media from people who want the world and “others” to be free of pain, anger, and critics!
We need to step into radical responsibility. We have to own our stuff. Relentlessly. Constantly turning back IN to see where we can grow and stop reading powerlessly with despair how and why the world is broken.
So, wake up… Gently… Tenderly… With an ocean of self-love… And let yourself fall into the Love you already carry… Let the Love of God transform you… Trust that letting yourself fall will have you rise… Trust that letting go of all that is preventing your healing, will allow the gift of healing to happen through you… BE BRAVE, LET GO, NOW!
I do not believe it is possible. I know it is possible.
With all my love and prayers,
Guillaume aka Shawinigan Ungaia